It eventually gets better

The sun eventually comes up and a new day is there for you to start new. The dark clouds will eventually clear, but why does eventually feel like never? I've been in this bottomless hole of blahhh for too long and I am sure millions of days from now I will look back and laugh about it, but at this moment laughs aren't an option. I wish every question I had came with direct prompt answers. I am sure this loneliness is a phase and I'm sure the anxiety will fade, but I wish this part in my life will fast forward.
My fortunes cookie today said "Always have old memories and young hopes" well it seems like keeping those things are the ones causing me pain. I can't keep the memories it's becoming to be what I feel is destroying me.
I still feel played, no one will probably ever understand why I can't let it go or move on, but for me to do so I need answers. "Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me." You always used to say that to me and how ironic it always applied towards you, more like fool me a million times then I'm a fxcking idiot. For now I'll settle for idiot.

...I don't want to go to work tomorrow morning....and I can't believe I nearly missed my midterm this morning.

FYI those random calls brighten my night like a starry eyed surprise.
PS: Greys Anatomy was by far mmmazing, the soundtracks are perfect.
PSS: I am surprised if anyone even bthers to take the time to over look my rambling of my oh so lame life. One day I am going to be a famous writer and everyone will be waiting to get a copy of whatever genuis book I write.

over and out soulfuldelight